I hit the wall, but kept going

Back in June, when my cousin first asked me to do WIPEOUTrun, I was immediately taken back to grade 8 gym class. “Ugh…my face feels kinda hot…did I miss the ball? Where’s the ball?”

Fears and negative self-talk filled my mind.red balls

“What if I can’t make it over the wall?”
“Monkey bars? Oh man, I can’t do that.”
“You want ME to be on your team?”

I was always picked last to join a team during my elementary school years. But, you know what? She wanted me!

Wait a minute…Hmmm?

(Note to cousin: Did you want me because I was the only one willing to risk injury and you knew that I was familiar with embarrassing falls?)

In the end, I decided to accept her challenge. If nothing else, I was certain we would have some humorous stories to tell our future grandchildren. So, I registered for the September 12th – 5K run, which would feature larger-than-life obstacles, inspired by the TV Show Wipeout.

Larger-than-life obstacles

As I am my own self-help guru (“positive thinking” ingrained into my psyche after years of listening to my dad’s Tony Robbins’ cassette tapes in our blue station wagon), and one who tends to think in analogies, I started to see that these larger-than-life obstacles were much like the “obstacles” I faced in my writing. They were simply a perceived threat.

This month marks the first anniversary of this blog, but I haven’t posted anything since May. Although I’ve received positive feedback from readers and those who say they are patiently waiting for another post, I still face fear and anxiety when writing down my thoughts and when it comes to pressing the “submit” button.

sweeperAnyway, participating in the WIPEOUTrun made me realize that the obstacles really weren’t that scary. They were big, but they were manageable. All I needed to do was to commit and go for it.

With that said, thank you for reading my blog. I look forward to reading your comments. I love to share my writing and connect with my readers…I will continue to write stories about parenting and parenting the soul and whatever else comes to mind.

For the next year, I plan to commit and go for it. And even if I “hit the wall” I will get up and keep going…because when I actually HIT – THE – WALL at the run, I ignored my fears – there was no time for any attempt at grace, as my face got really hot and… uh…there was a huge crowd of people waiting – I pulled myself up, straddled the wall and jumped down, to be greeted by my laughing cousin. She heard the thump from the other side. Still, it was a moment of victory.

So yeah, some of my writing will be fantastic. Some of it might just be “okay.” And, a lot of it may be just plain ugly…but, I’m certain it could never be as ugly as this:

happy endings slide

 

 

Christina’s Reviews

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